


School Sucked

by lrhaboggle



Category: The Devil's Carnival (Movies)
Genre: F/F, F/M, Musing, Sarcasm, Short Story, school au, student, teacher, troublesome
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-04-07
Updated: 2018-04-07
Packaged: 2019-04-19 16:36:10
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,828
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14241411
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/lrhaboggle/pseuds/lrhaboggle
Summary: Cora looked around herself. It was moments like these that made her wonder why she ever thought attending this place was a good idea. School sucked. Esteemed institution or not, it still had many flaws, yet here she was.





	School Sucked

Cora looked around herself. It was moments like these that made her wonder why she ever thought attending this place was a good idea. School sucked. Esteemed institution or not, it still had many flaws, yet here she was. It was just that, currently, one of the students was busy flirting with a girl named June and June was flirting back. This bothered Cora because Cora was supposed to be her girlfriend, however covert. June shouldn't be flirting with this bluenose wannabe bad-boy. What was his name again? Oh, right! Adam. Adam was currently trying to look sexy for June and June was indulging him despite it being quite obnoxious. Cora watched them with disgust. Adam wasn't even that good-looking. Besides, Adam was like the teacher's pet and June... well, let's just say that June was very well-acquainted with the detention center. A romance between them was bound to fail anyway, so why did they bother? He was the dean's favorite and she was the dean's least favorite and it appeared they were merely using each other for sport anyways. It wouldn't end well for either of them.

Finally, Cora couldn't take it anymore. She turned away from the love-struck couple and caught a glimpse of one of the few friends she had outside of June. His name was Aaron and he was quite the burly fellow. Despite his jock body-type, though, he was very quiet and calm and proper. He loved to read, but calling him a nerd didn't sound right. No, he was a scholar, an intellect! He just made reading look so refined. Even as the lessons were going on around them, he was lost in his book, sipping a thermos of tea. Cora smiled gently at that. As cold as Aaron was, he was not without a soft side. Cora was one of the few who got to see that soft side, both of them bonding over their shared love of reading and their more reserved and mature personalities.

Then, on the other side of Aaron, was a man named David. He was currently preening himself in a little mirror and occasionally flirting with several the schoolgirls nearby. They all look rather freaked out, but Cora couldn't blame him. David was a bit of a creepazoid and he was a self-proclaimed fashionista. Such arrogance mixed with such little regard for what the women he courted wanted made him a less-than-desirable suitor to everyone, even though he seemed totally ignorant to that fact.

"Creep!" Cora whispered to herself as she caught David almost kissing his mirror before throwing her a wink. She looked away.

A few seats back and to the left of Cora was Ted, DJ and singer extraordinaire. Unlike David, he was a far friendlier character. He was, at the moment, listening to music and fiddling with a music app on his phone. Surrounding him were three pretty girls who were the top singers of the school's choir. Cora wanted to join them someday. She loved singing and was very talented, but she was still too young to join them yet and she still had a lot to learn. The three girls were named Pearl, Virginia and Geraldine, Geraldine being the leader of the trio. They were peeking over Ted's shoulder at the app he was using and they occasionally tapped a few things on the screen, giggling. Cora wasn't sure what exactly they were doing but she had the feeling it was either some piano app or they were playing one of those music games where you had to hit the right notes in the right other. Either way, the four were having an absolute blast and Cora did smile as she watched them. Ted was a guy who could flirt with her and get a positive response, unlike David. But Ted didn't seem to be interested in romance, nor did his three female friends. Music was their love.

Then, in the far back, twiddling with his grandfather's old camera, was Barry. Cora didn't like him at all. In fact, she hated him so much that she would've preferred David. Barry was just so self-righteous and he bullied Cora endlessly just because she was lesbian. Granted, the school had a policy against same-sex couples with even their most accepting people following the don't ask and don't tell rule, but still. Was there any reason Barry had to make cruel, crude and humiliating remarks? Was there any reason he had to constantly blackmail Cora about her attraction to other women? Was there a reason Barry had to be so creepy? He was one of the guys who acted all hoity-toity about same-sex romance and yet was a pervert to the core, just as bad as David in terms of reading in on whether or not a woman was consenting to his affections. Barry was just a gossip and a snitch and the whole journalism major was just an excuse for him to continue this habit, always running around and snapping photos of random students with that loud and obnoxious camera.

Finally, Cora couldn't bear to look at the arrogant boy anymore and she left him and his camera alone, turning her gaze to the opposite side of the room. The students there weren't exactly Cora's favorites either though. Funny, this school was supposed to be such a wonderful and loving school, yet Cora found herself hating most of the student body. Even June got on her nerves from time to time, but these students that Cora was looking at were a cut above the rest. Their names were Jimmy Bentz and Chantal Batez. They were nerdy losers who were scrawny and easily victimized. Perhaps that was why they were training to be cops. As cops, they would finally receive the respect and obedience they had so long been denied. Cora had to admit it too, they were incredibly good at their jobs. Actually, it was almost scary. It was like they enjoyed inflicting punishment. They were a very sadistic pair and it was made even more unsettling by their seemingly harmless appearance. They really were both so physically unintimidating. He was gangly and she was small and they had the weirdest accents in the world. It wasn't hard to see why a majority of the school liked to pick on them, but when it came to disciplinary action, those two were always on point. Cora made sure to steer clear of them.

"Does anybody know how many angels fell with Lucifer in his first war against God?" the professor asked suddenly, his loud voice bringing Cora and all the other students back to the present.

"1/3," Adam said promptly, voice clean and clear as he answered before anyone else could even raise a hand. Cora rolled her eyes while June snickered slightly. What a teacher's pet!

"Good," the professor said. "Now, can anyone tell me what is the golden rule?"

"Do unto others as you would have them do unto you. Found in Matthew 7:12," Aaron replied without looking from his book. The professor nodded, not bothering to tell the young scholar to put the book down. He knew the boy would just pick it up again as soon as his back was turned. The professor chose instead to turn to the rest of the students, sharp eyes hunting for someone to pick on…

"David! What was the name of the Philistine your namesake fought?" the professor asked suddenly, choosing his victim. It was a well-made choice because David had been too busy with his own reflection and was so caught off guard it was all he could do to try and look calm and collected. He swallowed nervously and set his mirror down but when no answer came to him, he shook his head. It was clear his ego was hurting. The professor exhaled heavily. "Five points deducted, David!" he said. "Now, does anyone else know?" David lowered his head in embarrassment, looking into his mirror for solace. At least he was still handsome.

"I think I know," a new voice piped up. Cora involuntarily sighed in disgust. It was Barry.

"Go on then, Barry, do tell us," the professor replied.

"It was that big old giant, Goliath!" he replied. Maybe it was just Cora, but she thought she heard just a little bit of a sneer in Barry's voice.

"Correct," clearly, the Professor hadn't heard it.

"Now does anybody know how long The Flood lasted?" he asked next.

"40 days and nights," a 3-part harmony gave the reply and the whole class turned to see Pearl, Virginia and Geraldine grinning.

"And the whole shebang was wrapped up by a little turtle dove trying to find a solid spot to rest its feet!" Ted added. The professor nodded.

"Good, good. Now I have another question," the large man inspected the classroom before choosing his next victims. "Batez! Bentz!" he cried.

"Yes sir?!" the couple asked, grinning widely, their accents ringing in thick.

"Which of you can answer how exactly Jesus was crucified?" the professor asked.

"Both of us can!" they said in unison. Then they rattled off the answer back and forth. "First, they whipped him. Then they put on his crown of thorns. Then they made him carry his own cross up the mountain. Then they nailed him on. They left him there to die and, to make sure he was dead… they stabbed him right in the side!" they exclaimed. In Cora's opinion, they were way too happy about that.

"Good. Good," the Professor nodded and turned away to check a book on his desk. "So, who can tell me-"

SPLAT! a spitball struck the Professor's turned back.

"WHO DID THAT?!" he roared, his wrath frightened all the students into submission, yet nobody dared reply. His face was red with rage as he stormed into the center of the classroom, beady eyes trying to detect the guilty one. The whole class, dead silent, could hear him breathing hard. Still nobody even dared breathe, let alone answer his question.

"Fine then! If nobody will answer, you'll all receive three days of detention!" he boomed before slamming his fist on the nearest desk he could. The desk happened to belong to one of the students who called themselves Glad-hands. The poor fellow nearly fell out of his seat in surprise but the professor ignored it, still blind with fury. Cora's eyes darted over to June and she saw the blond wiping her lips subtly. Cora couldn't bring herself to rat June out though so, instead, Cora exhaled tiredly. She looked all around herself. Everyone else was still shaking, some from fear and some from trying to contain their laughter. Part of that spitball was still stuck on the back of the professor's balding head. Cora looked around herself. It was moments like these that made her wonder why she ever thought attending this place was a good idea. School sucked.

**Author's Note:**

> AN: I didn't include this in the main NU series because it's kind of an AU of that series where the teachers have become students. In my official NU series, people like Agent, Librarian, Designer, etc. are all teachers but this story casts them as students with God being the only teacher here. This AU aspect is why it was posted separately from the NU series. And as you can see, I am very uncreative in naming, choosing to use the actors' names instead of coming up with real ones. LOL.


End file.
